Please write 3 TSR Journal entries in response to the NY Times article, When Parents are Too Toxic to Tolerate.
Post one of them online below so that I can evaluate your understanding of the TSR Journal and your use of MLA format and submit 2 of them on paper at our next class, remembering your submission guidlines.
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"she is always been extremely abusive."
ReplyDeleteHer mother abused her for a very long time. It is causing her mental damages.
She should just pack up and leaver he mother and just start a new life without her. If she is there taking all that abuse that means she is very emotionally weak and needs to break up that fear. It is hard to do so but it is the only remedy.
@ Geo-- remember to use an MLA citation for your text. I'd love you to get a little more in depth with your responses.
ReplyDeleteThis quote is really harsh! A parent should never be abusive to their kids. What’s the point of reproducing if you are not going to appreciate them? These types of people make me sick to my stomach. You can settle any type of dispute by dialogue in a well civilized matter. There is no need for any verbal or physical abuse. If the parent really doesn’t love/care about their children they should of just give them up for adoption as soon as they were born. There is no need to harm a human being in any way especially when it’s something that came out of you. It’s is really upsetting that the world has these kind of people. Advice to the patient is she is already an adult she can live her life without her mother and focus on her life. Leave all of that in the past.
ReplyDelete* “I feel I should try,” my patient told me, “but I know she’ll be awful to me.”( eight paragraph in Friedman)
ReplyDeleteNow that her mother was approaching death, she was torn about yet another effort at reconciliation. She would feel guilty if she didn’t get along with her mother before she died. She wants to give effort in trying but her mother did say hurtful things. In my opinion many children would wish death upon their parents if they were mistreated this way. Others would try and make the parent feel that the child cares for them even if they say harmful things.
@ Geo-- Good work, that's more like it!
ReplyDelete“We cannot undo history with therapy. But we can help mend brains and minds by removing or reducing stress” (Dr.Richard A. Friedman)
ReplyDeleteSummary: He is saying that even with therapy it won’t make you forget about your past conflicts but it will help you reduce depression and stress.
Response: I strongly agree with him because nothing can make you forget about your past. It’s like a scar that can’t be healed. Therapy is not a solution to make us forget about the issues we have. Its guidance and a start to help us reduce the mental illness that the past has brought into our brain. It diminishes our stress levels and depression.
@ Malissa-- Remember to post the text (no need to specify which paragraph), the summary (which you did) and the response (which is missing in your post).
ReplyDeleteText: “I feel I should try,” my patient told me, “but I know she’ll be awful to me.” (Friedman, M.D)
ReplyDeleteSummary: Not being in contact with her mother make the woman feel depress. She would try to get close to her, even though her mom will not appreciate her good feelings towards her.
Response: In my personal opinion, I think that is terrible not being in contact with a parent. But, having a toxic parent is really hard to digest. Being in the woman’s pants, I will just stay away from my mother knowing that she will not accept me. It is really hard to have a parent that treats you awful. The woman should just continue with her life away from her mother and enjoy it with the ones that really appreciate her feelings.
@ Fernando-- Good work, no need to give the author's first name-- just the last name will do.
ReplyDeleteText: “ Sometimes, as drastic as it sounds, that means letting go of a toxic parent”
ReplyDelete(as quoted in Friedman)
Summary: It’s better letting things how it is. Just let does parents that are “toxic parents” get away from you and your life.
Response: I definitely think is better to just let go. If you keep trying to get alone with a parent that just won’t forget you or that just make your life a living hell get away from them. Parents are supposed to be there for you no matter what. However, if in your case you have a “toxic parent” is just not worth it to keep trying. Even though you going to feel guilty or bad about the situation, you did you part of looking out for them.
@ Chriz, good work, no need to add M.D. after Freidman, just the last name will do here. As a side note, the expression is to be in another person's shoes-- being in someone's pant's has a much different meaning.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteText: A patient of mine, a lovely woman in her 60’s who I treated for depression, recently asked my advice about how to deal with her aging mother (Friedman).
ReplyDeleteSummary: This phrase is telling me that as you get older you could get into depression. It is also telling me, that you could lose it for too much stress on your mind.
Response: In my experiences that in this country people could stress out a lot at work. Nowadays people are stressing even more with the economy situation. And for that people could need help without knowing it. Depression could be really harmful and get serious. Some people could handle it and other can not.
Quote: “She’s always been extremely abusive”
ReplyDeleteSummary: When she said this it basically because her mother would mentally abuse her children.
Response: No one in the right mind should mentally abuse their children because you’re the parent who brought them into this world. What kind a person would you be if you did that? Life is about accepting for what you are and what you do. No one is the judge of what you do and I Quote “She said as I recall once on my birthday, she left me a message wishing that I get a disease”. Something is seriously wrong with her mother to say something like that. It can make you think what kind of person we have in this world for it to be so cruel.
Enjoy...
Text: “But Just as there are ordinary good-enough parents who mysteriously produce a difficult child, there are some decent people who have the misfortune of having a truly toxic parent” (Friedman, MD)
ReplyDeleteSummary: Friedman, MD is saying that as there are parents that have difficult children there is also adults that have the bad luck of having a toxic parent in their life, he’s contrasting both situation as a negative thing in a person’s life.
Response: I strongly agree. I believe that in each of these two situations there is an equal way to affect a person in many ways for example mentally and sentimentally. I found this really interesting although I never been through a similar situation. I feel that for a person, family is a really import part in their life and you should always try to keep a positive bond. Overall, I think that people should have the courage to go on in life when they found themselves in these situations, because is just our fortune and is not something that we choose for in our life; but yet we still do have to accept and have resignation for the fact that is our family.
Estrella
Text: ''Now that her mother was aproaching death, she was torn about yet another effort at reconcilliation''
ReplyDeleteSummary: The women basically is split in between on whether she should give one last shot with her and her mother coming to peace.
Response: In my own personal opinion, I believe she should give it one last shot with her mother because if she is ''torn'' between what to do, and ultimately decides to leave things the way they are, by the time her mother passes she most likely will have some regret and may decide that she should of done everything she can to make it work. Your more at peace knowing that you've done everything you can, and that the rest was out of your control.
Text - “We also know that although prolonged childhood trauma can be toxic to the brain, adults retain the ability later in life to rewire their brains by new experience, including therapy and psychotropic medication.” (Friedman)
ReplyDeleteSummary- This passage is about toxic parents, and how their negative force and neglect is harmful to their children. For instance, extended amount of stress can kill cells in the hippocampus, which is a brain area critical for memory. Toxic parents give their children a psychological harm, which leads to negative feelings and thoughts about themselves.
Response - I find the passage “When Parents Are Too Toxic to Tolerate “, interesting because I could relate to it, in the sense where I know people with toxic parents or with the same attitude as the ones in this passage. I have friends who’s parents don’t accept their sexuality, just because they’re very “old fashioned” and stubborn. I don’t agree with the parent’s attitude, because I could imagine myself in their children’s shoes, and I’m sure it isn’t a very pleasurable feeling to be uncared for by those who you love dearly.
My quote is "his father took him aside and told him it would been better if he, rather than his younger brother, had died in a car accident his several years earler".
ReplyDeleteSummary: The quote that I chose is that the father is very abousive with the choice of words he used about why his son is gay and chose to be that way. He doesn't understand how much damage it can cause.
Response: my personal reponse is who gives parents the rihgt to judge their own childern when they are not perfect themselves. To think about it the way you can say that the person chose to be gay but who is to say that, that is not perfect? Or maybe the father was raised in a way that he was brain washed or just mind is rotted with absurd thoughts.
JOSSIMAR:
ReplyDeleteTEXT: “She’s always been extremely abusive of me and my siblings.” (Friedman)
SUMMARY: Well the daughter is say that her mother is hitting her and her siblings.
The mother is saying awful things to her on her birthday. The mother isn’t being polite to them.
She need some type of therapy.
RESPONSE: I know this isn’t the right way a parent should treat their children. No parent is perfect and everyone knows being abusive doesn’t make things better. The parents that are abusive that means they are having a hard time in life. So they take it out on their children. They need to go therapy and talk it out instead of being abusive to their children. Cause there could be a point when they would try to kill them and then have worst problem. Children are in danger when parents are abusive.
"'She's always been extremely abusive'"
ReplyDeleteShe's been abused by her mother for too long
its causing her stress.
She needs to stay away from her mother, she tried many times before to reconcile but her mother has been harsh and critical. Is best for her to forgive and stay away from the matter,although it's her mother and is a hard decision to make. My opinion is that no parent should treat their children like that it's wrong and cold, I mean it's your own blood and part of your life.
In conclusion she has to stay away from her mother even though she loves her it's the right decision so she can feel stress free.
@ GisselleZ-- Good work, be sure you are working in word to catch some grammatical issue before posting. It will make your writing more effective.
ReplyDelete@JMa-- You have the TSR format down right, but remember to view the texts you chose in relation to the piece as a whole, not just as a stand alone text.
ReplyDelete@Steve-- good work, don't forget to include the author's name with the text.
ReplyDelete@ BqUilLeRa0820-- Good work! No need to include MD after Freidman. Just the author's last name will do.
ReplyDeleteIn the article, “When Parents Are Too Toxic To Tolerate” , there are instances where an adult must chose to avoid their parents, or try to rebuild and/or continue some kind of a relationship with their parents. Dr. Friedman has done many studies that conclude in the fact that humans are “hard-wired for bonding – even to those who aren’t nice to us”. I personally believe that this is true. I know many people who, although their friends and family have acted harshly toward them for some reason, they continue to befriend and love them. I think that although a patient may be slightly reluctant or upset by abandoning a “toxic” parent, it is crucial to their own well-being and growth. Although its cliché, the majority of the time I would say two wrongs do not make a right. However, if a person is suffering from their parents’ opinions and actions even after trying to make it work, it may be only right to cut off all ties. Of course, I am no doctor, but in my opinion Dr. Friedman has treated these patients well, and I agree completely with him in every aspect.
ReplyDeleteParents should remember that one day they will need there kids so they should treat there kids with respect and make sure they have a good relationship with there children so when they get older the kids will want to help there parents
ReplyDelete